Text: Paul Hofman
Photo: Leon Hendrickx
Video: Paradox Productions
Ambassador André Donker: 'Together we are one family'
To his surprise To he was asked earlier this year to become one of the six figureheads of Pride Amsterdam. André (59) didn’t hesitate for a moment and immediately said yes. He is a striking man proud of 'his' community. He is also a man on a mission who, as ambassador of Pride Amsterdam, wants to break the taboo around fetish. 'Fetish is so much more.'
Fascination
Just a stone’s throw from the Westertoren is the shop where he has been at the helm for seven years. When I arrive at the end of the morning he is busy with a customer. 'His' store is one of the largest fetish shops in our country. Customers from all over the world find their way there. The shop spans three floors, where he proudly shows me the many leather and fetish products. How did his fascination for leather start?
'My fascination with leather came completely naturally. My parents ran a leather specialty shop in Gorinchem. They had an extensive range — not only did they sell bags and belts, but also rugged leather jackets. As a child I was already nosey around the leather clothing. It smelled wonderful.'
Rugged, exciting and sexy
At sixteen he wore his father’s leather jacket to secondary school. 'I thought it was rugged and exciting. And also sexy.' At twenty he bought his first leather trousers. His passion for this material would endure. 'Leather is a beautiful, natural material. The longer you wear it, the more it comes alive. The older it gets, the more beautiful. When I wear it it gives me a kind of power. It gives me a strong act de présence. Incidentally, that can also happen with something like my cowboy boots. Your posture just changes — sexier.'
Leather is more
He was twenty when his best friend took him to a leather party in Amsterdam, he says. That’s when he was hooked on the leather scene. At first it felt awkward, but many years later the fetish community held no secrets for him. 'It was a revelation for me. A fascinating world. It doesn’t matter who or what you are. The scene radiates great warmth. Everyone belongs. There is total openness.' He emphasizes that the leather fetish is an important part of his life. 'Leather is so much more.' The image the outside world has of the fetish scene, he says, is absolutely wrong. 'It shouldn’t inspire fear. It’s actually a community with many groups — lovers of lacquer, leather, rubber, latex, neoprene (synthetic rubber, PH), sportswear and puppies — with lots of mutual respect and a close-knit atmosphere.'
Prejudices
As ambassador of Pride he wants to remove those prejudices and show that fetish is rugged, exciting, sexy and inclusive for everyone. In the eighties, when André was growing up, the leather scene was very visible. Men and women walked through the city in leather; brawny men stood in large numbers outside the bars in the Warmoesstraat. It was a time when you could be seen on the street in your leather outfit, your fetish could be visible, people were proud of it. It gave a feeling of freedom/victory.
Openness
Those years are now well behind us, he stresses. 'The world has changed; it’s become more conservative. Fetish parties nowadays too often take place behind closed doors. People only dare to change at the event.' He finds that a pity. He himself goes to work dressed in leather. 'I am who I am. I’m very open about my preference. Of course I sometimes get looks, but I don’t lose sleep over that. I don’t care.' Leather is his second skin, he says. Leather is simply a natural and arousing material. 'Through social media there is more and more overlap.'
Connectedness
Connecting people will be his message as ambassador. 'With the different letters LHBTIQA+ we are one family, aren’t we?' Visibility and connectedness form the common thread for him. 'Showing that we exist and building bridges between the different groups in our community.' He welcomes the fact that several major fashion designers include leather and fetish in their collections. 'That is such an important development.' Leather must become salonfähig. He continues: 'I will talk to people, explain how the fetish world works.' Familiarity breeds affection applies here as well. For André leather is a second skin. 'By the way: the leather fetish is more than just sex — it’s simply a lifestyle.'
During Pride he will be visible at various events. In the meantime he and his husband Ronald, together with four co-organisers, are organising the seventh edition of Pride at the Beach in Zandvoort. Not only for the fetish scene but for the entire lhbtiq+ community he is a committed fighter. 'You always have to do it together: meet together, work, party and above all be curious about each other.' He can’t wait to fulfil his role as ambassador. And the theme TOGETHER is woven deep into his fibres.
Pride ambassador since 2024
